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Keith and Angle Brackets · This, by Dave Walk­er, shows up fif­teen mes­sages or so in­to the com­ments on a Dive Win­er piece, and I can’t link to it di­rect­ly (noth­ing pur­ple) [Up­date: yes there is, and I can], but it’s way too good to pass up: When the world end­s, the on­ly things left will be cock­roach­es, rat­s, Kei­th Richard­s, and man­gled text that has been es­caped one-too-many or one-too-few times.
Silly Internet Game · Meme via Burn­ing Bird: From Charlotte’s Web by E.B. White: “Mr. Zuck­er­man heard too, and he came out of the ma­chine shed where he was mend­ing a tool.” In­struc­tion­s: Grab the near­est book, open it to page 23, find the 5th sen­tence, and post its text along with these in­struc­tion­s. I would add to the in­struc­tion­s: point back to where you got the idea so that we can fol­low the thread­s.
Crushing Statistics · I think it was Dave Win­er who orig­i­nal­ly point­ed out that the Govern­ment of Cana­da has has a bunch of RSS feeds. I sub­scribed to the main Na­tion­al News feed; it has some pre­dictable puffery along the lines of “Prime Min­is­ter out­lines bold vi­sion for fu­ture of llama-farming,” but al­so has use­ful health alerts (there’s been some nasty stuff get­ting in­to the hon­ey sup­ply), plus The Dai­ly, a reg­u­lar snip­pet of statis­tics from Statis­tics Canada, which for some weird rea­son is a world lead­er in the field of coun­try mea­sure­men­t. In today’s Dai­ly I found some Crush­ing statis­tics.
Blogging Strategy Funnies · I didn’t think I was com­ing to Sun to work on blog­ging and syn­di­ca­tion, but it turns out the whole in­dus­try has wo­ken up to the fact that There’s Some­thing Hap­pen­ing Here, and so it’s burn­ing quite a few of my cy­cles, and has al­so gen­er­at­ed a cou­ple of amus­ing (and in­struc­tive) anec­dotes ...
Nitrogen head · Dropped by the doc­tor to get some sun-damage spots re­moved from the top of my head—this prob­lem is not un­com­mon in pale white bald guys. They do this very sim­ply, by dip­ping a swab in liq­uid ni­tro­gen and freez­ing the spots of­f. They call it “burning” and it feels like burn­ing, quite un­pleas­an­t. The doc­tor said I might get a headache, and I was won­der­ing about sud­den drops in brain tem­per­a­ture. Wait a sec­ond... maybe I could over­clock.
Pet Technology · It’s Fri­day, silli­ness is al­lowed. I can’t imag­ine this point­er will last long.
Nautical Geek Joke · As pre­vi­ous­ly not­ed, I sub­scribed to The Gun­room, the on­line home of Pa­trick O’Brian fancier­s; in the first day there have been two not-bad jokes. This one con­cerns a pirate’s par­rot who got a bad case of sun­stroke and was heard crow­ing Pieces of sev­en, pieces of sev­en. Which was clear­ly a par­roty er­ror.
Arab Potatoes · Joke cour­tesy of Car­rol Cox: An old Arab man who has been liv­ing for 40 years in Ida­ho want­ed to cul­ti­vate pota­toes in his gar­den, but dig­ging up the earth was get­ting to be too hard at his age. His on­ly son, Ali, was study­ing in France, so he de­cid­ed to send him an e-mail ex­plain­ing the sit­u­a­tion: “Dear Ali: I feel very dis­ap­point­ed be­cause this year I'll be un­able to plant my pota­toes in my gar­den. I am too old to plow the ground. I wish you were here, then my prob­lems would be solved, be­cause you would re­move the soil for me. I love you, Dad” “Dad: For God's sake, DO NOT re­move the ground of that gar­den. It's there that I have hid­den ‘you-know-what’. I love you, Ali” At 4 a.m. the next day the lo­cal po­lice, plus FBI and CIA agents, along with Pen­tagon del­e­gates, came in and turn the gar­den up­side down look­ing for dan­ger­ous ma­te­ri­al to build bomb­s, an­thrax or what­ev­er. They found noth­ing and they left. The same day the old man re­ceived an­oth­er e-mail from his son: “Dear Dad: I am sure you can plant your pota­toes now. It was the best I could do in the cur­rent cir­cum­stances. I love you, Ali”
When Bad Things Happen to Good Vegetables · The pain from this tragedy has abat­ed some­what, prob­a­bly be­cause it all hap­pened dur­ing the win­ter of ’83-’84 and time heals if not all then at least some wound­s ...
Sheep Emblem Azerbaijan · I am un­able to re­sist one more un­in­ten­tion­al fun­ny cour­tesy of the ad­mirable NetNewWire delta fea­ture ...
Ian’s Joke · Ian Ja­cobs told me this one-liner: “Did you hear about the ju­rispru­dence fetishist who got off on a technicality?”
Data Potato Doo-wop Doo-wop · This en­try (I won’t dig­ni­fy it with the term “essay”) con­tains en­tire­ly pure unadul­ter­at­ed silli­ness ...
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